


After

by ix_tab



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Brain Damage, F/M, M/M, disabled sexuality, implications of manipulation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-26
Updated: 2012-09-26
Packaged: 2017-11-15 01:48:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 590
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/521835
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ix_tab/pseuds/ix_tab
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mituna changes but his feelings don't. He learns to deal with them, and the people he cares about in the aftermath.</p>
            </blockquote>





	After

**Author's Note:**

> Just me, having some Mituna feelings all over the place. This didn't turn out to be the sexy times fic I was intending! I hope to write that next.

After everything goes white and clear and burnt at the edges, Latula won't kiss you, not like she used to. 

And it makes you sad and angry and scared. You push her away, you don't want her to hug you, to wipe a hand across your forehead, to kiss your brow, or pap at you.

You aren't pale for her, you know you aren't, and it doesn't matter that your mind pops and fizzes when you concentrate too hard now, you are the same person. 

You are. 

You look at Latula, opening your eyes as wide as they will go, trying, trying anything to see if somehow, everything's changed.

It hurts and your eyes water, but you keep staring at her, willing her to understand. She comes over to you and offers a red gloved hand. You take it between your two hands, and bite down on the glove, tasting plastic, and underneath, her skin, and pricks of her blood.

She smiles at you, properly, and then laughs loud and hard. She pushes your shoulder until you let go, and then she grabs your arm, dragging you behind her, as she charges off to find something radical to distract you both with.

You like that a lot more then the gentleness. 

People talk at you now. You hate it. They make so much noise, and it doesn't flow or sing, it just hangs there, and they look at you, waiting and waiting for you to act some way that isn't in you anymore, and you have to force yourself to pick the meaning out of the noise.

Latula waits for you. She listens for you, lets you take your time. 

She doesn't ignore you, doesn't shout at you, lets you finish. Sometimes you want her to hold you down, to bind your arms so they can't touch anything, to hold a hand around your throat and hum against your ears. 

And it takes a while, and its long and frustrating and makes you sad-scared, but she touches you again, like she used to, and she looks in your eyes, straight and true.

You aren't sure what she sees, but she seems to find something in there that makes her show her teeth, wide and sharp. It's not the same as it was before, but it is what it is, and it's good.

Kurloz doesn't make noise anymore. Sometimes that's good, sometimes you sit with him and he smiles behind his makeup and he shows you his hands and makes the symbols for asking permission

and you shout YES, and its louder then you meant, and you cringe because its an ugly noise, but Kurloz still smiles, and he reaches out and guides you gentle to lay with your head resting on his thigh. 

He used to run his hands through your hair, but now you don't like that, can't handle that amount of stimulation, so he puts one large hand on the middle of your spine. 

Solid cooling pressure radiates from it, and you feel quiet, quiet everywhere.

Sometimes you are scared of Kurloz now, but mostly you can ignore the way his voice that doesn't come from his throat burns and tears at you, because he knows how to push and pull at you until you reach a cold, sweet calm.

Latula makes you burn and squirm and bite, and Kurloz keeps you cool and strong and silent. It might not be like before, but you are here in the after and thats all you can be.

It's enough.


End file.
